Take Time....

Sometimes I find myself sitting alone and replaying the events of recent days/weeks/months.  Tonight, as we close the day, I am reminiscing about the summer of 2014.  Yes, there have been summers with more life changing happenings, bigger changes and maybe even more excitement. However, I was sad to see this one end.  

This summer was a bit of a blur for me.  I spent the beginning prepping for our annual beach trip, the middle working on a presentation for a July business trip and then traveling.  Once that trip was over, it was time to squeeze in the last few weeks of summer.  We made a trip to Charlotte and then last week we finished it out the way it started, in Hilton Head.  After two trips there this summer, I can definitely say that is my happy place.  And.. it became so much better two years ago when my best friend relocated there.  

I had lots of time this summer with my family and friends.  I have some special memories of real quality time spent with the people that I love so dearly.  I want to thank my sister, Mom and best friend, Mel for taking the time out of their lives to spend it with us this summer.  Thanks to my brother for traveling to Charlotte to help us make my mother's birthday special and for watching my furry child so we could go to the beach one last time before summer was over.  I am truly blessed with some amazing people to share this journey.  

I hope that every year you take the time to leave work behind, escape the daily life that keeps us so busy and have some uninterrupted time with those you love.  I am truly grateful to have no doubt that I work so that I can enjoy life spent with those I cherish.  I take great pride in my work, but at the end of the day I turn it off and come home.  

The Me You See

I am well aware that I don't always give myself credit for the progress I have made throughout my weight loss journey.  I see a version of me, at times, that is full of flaws.  When I realize this is happening I try to focus on the positive, but I have to admit it is truly hard to see the version of myself that others see.

I recently took a business trip that involved returning to my previous workplace and seeing all my old coworkers.  It was wonderful to see all those people that mean so much, receive warm hugs and wonderful compliments about the way I look.  I won't lie... the little girl inside was glowing after all the comments.  However, there was a sadness because I knew that I have yet to see the physical image they were complimenting. 

It would be nice to have a mirror that shows us the person everyone else sees.  I know part of my problem is the weight issue, that I will always struggle with, but I think this goes for everyone.  We are often hard on ourselves about things that others see in a completely different way, and most likely a much more positive one.  So the next time you receive a compliment take it to heart and give yourself credit where it is due.  And when you look in the mirror and see your faults, pause, and try to focus on all the beautiful things you possess.  

We are all beautiful in a very special and unique way.  Allow yourself to be happy where you are and with who you are.  This does not mean that you stop improving your life through exercise, eating right, strengthening your brain, breaking bad habits, etc.  It just means giving yourself credit for all the amazing things that make you the wonderful person you are. 

Behind the Scenes....

I often blog about my journey, what it means to me, how it has changed my life, etc...  However, there is a very important piece to the puzzle that I don't often give as much credit as it is due.

When you have this type of lifestyle it takes support from others to make it work.  I receive this from my friends and family daily.  They continue to help me push myself to new levels, given me ideas to mix up my workouts, accompany me on hikes, even trained for half marathons with me and allow me time to spend exercising.  When you make this type of lifestyle change the people and things in your life are naturally impacted.  Therefore, they can make it easier or harder depending on the role they play.

Luckily, Kent and the kids have been wonderful throughout this continuing development process to become a stronger and healthier me.  They have allowed me to drag them on hikes, through months of half marathon training and several eating changes that meant clearing out old food and replacing with new healthier choices.  But one of the largest things they do to support me is allow time to exercise.  Some weeks this is no small sacrifice as I can spend over nine hours working out.  This time spent doing these physical activities, I get so much benefit from, is something I have come to appreciate and cherish.  I try to never waste anytime and realize the importance it holds.

This lifestyle is easy for those of us living it, but sometimes those around us don't understand it.  Some will say we are torturing ourselves, insane or should let up a little.  I know my friends and family that don't share this passion/obsession/addiction (whatever you want to call it) don't always understand it, but I am grateful for those of you that are right there anyway.  Thanks for your continued support, love and encouragement.  You have contributed a huge amount to the fact that I have had so much success on this journey.  I did not want all of you to feel your contribution goes unrecognized because I am reminded often of the role others play in this.

I am sure people succeed on this journey without the support of friends and family, but I know mine has been greatly enhanced by this.  I would not want to travel this road without all those that have kept me going and continue to support me.  All my love, respect and thanks is extended to you!

The Secret to Success.....

I have talked about my weight loss journey more than usual this week.  When I share the total number of pounds I have shed over the last 6 years people always want to know the answer, the secret or the magic formula.  I am here to tell you and everyone that asks that there is no such thing.  This journey takes a lot of hard work, but when you want it bad enough it happens.

There are definitely easier ways to lose weight, but almost everyone I know that has tried these tricks, fads, etc end up with the weight back and some extra pounds as a bonus.  If you are going to spend the time doing this, you might as well do it the right way.  I always feel this way when I see people at the gym barely working out.  I try my best to take advantage of the time I spend away from my family for exercise by making it count.  You can push yourself a lot further than you think and the results on the other side of that limit are pretty amazing.  All of the weight loss and exercise changes won't happen overnight, but you will start to see positive changes not only in your appearance but your confidence and mental health.

Here I must mention that a little setback does not mean complete failure.  Let yourself have a bad day, week, month; however, when you realize you have gone off track veer back on course and start again.  The biggest mistake I have seen myself and others make on this journey is to take a mistake and turn it into more and more days off track. It is as if they think well I screwed up so what is the point.  Well, I can tell you where the bad eating, the not exercising and this thought process will get you.... just with more ground to cover next time you decide to make the change.

Also, don't put it off.  Don't self talk yourself into starting back on Monday or after vacation or whatever silly timeline you give yourself.  As soon as the thought of wanting to return to your path occurs, go quickly there and don't hesitate. It is too easy to keep putting it off more and more.  And don't say oh I won't keep putting it off.  I am just as guilty of this self talk and know the very small percentage of time that is actually works.

Don't allow yourself to say you don't have time to track your food, time to exercise or a place to workout.  The best gym in the world is right outside your door and the equipment you need is closer than you think, yourself.  If you have your body and the great outdoors, you are all set to begin your exercise journey.  In regards to eating right and tracking your food, there is way more time than you think but it needs to be priority.

Actually this whole journey needs to be set high on the list of priorities.  Don't feel selfish for putting this high on the list of things to do.  You are important, and your health is very important to those that love you.  I can't imagine your friends and family not helping you find the time to get this stuff done and in return they get a healthier, happier you.  Heck they might even get more years of you alive with them.  Get your family on board, tell your friends what you are doing.  They will help support you.

I have been doing this for 6 years now and I still have my bad days.  I have just learned to allow myself those times and move to the next day with the right choices in mind.  If this is going to be something that sticks, I can't let a few bad days stop me.

Go into each day as a fresh start and focus on how you are going to make that day a step toward the you that you want to be.  No one else can be blamed for you not being that person today and no one else can get you to where you want to be.  Take responsibility and make that change.

Sometimes....

Sometimes life isn't perfect.  Sometimes we begin to get lost in the stress of unimportant tasks, bills and things that just seem to not be working out right for us.  Although these things can bring us down, they are not the fiber of our lives.  Therefore, we can't allow them unnecessary control.  

Today was one of those moments where I realize that the insignificant things were taking over, and I was allowing them to control my mood, my reactions and my life.  But when I really sat down and thought about the reasons for these things a startling revelation occurred.  It was some of the most amazing experiences in my life that had resulted in what I was feeling were awful circumstances.  

I could have a huge savings balance, but I would have to miss out on so much.  The memories made from the money spent on family vacations, taking our children to new places and sharing things we love is worth every cent.  So tonight I am grateful for the savings I am able to spend on these times together with those I love and the memories we are making together.  Even if it does mean less cushion for unexpected events.  You can't put a price tag on the experiences I have had and those that I am giving my children. I am sharing my greatest loves with them, and this is a fiber of my being.  It is priceless.   

Additionally there is a house in Indiana that continues to throw unimportant stress into my path.  I have allowed that house to take on a role in my life that it does not deserve.  It is a very special place where many memories were born.  It is a place where a young couple began their lives together, started a family and where they chose a new path for that growing family. It should not hold this anger and stress.  When we decided to leave Indiana and begin this new journey three years ago we took a risk.  As with any gamble there has been some loss.  However, this move has afforded our family so much happiness and so many amazing blessings.  So a few repairs and expenses are a small price to pay for the gains we have received.  I choose to allow the house to be filled with happy memories of our life and not a source of stress.  

The stress of an overwhelming workload can ruin a day.  The obligation of supporting a family can allow a job to take on too much importance and cause stress, but it is a choice to allow it to control me.  I need to remember that how I choose to deal with work related stress has a huge impact.  Here I am reminded of a quote that  I first saw in my grandmother's house of the serenity prayer, "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference."  

Although I can't control the number of requests I get, I can do my best to address them thoroughly and realize that the frustrated person is not really angry with me but a circumstance that has been put before them.  If there is one thing I can be certain of when it comes to work, I will never allow that stress to control me.  I was taught by a very special man that life is too short to give all of yourself to a job.  It is the things we work so hard for that are the fiber of life, and they deserve our time too.  I give a lot of myself for my job and I take the responsibility of it very seriously; however, it will never come before the truly important people in my life.  

I hope to look to tomorrow with a new outlook, hope and the continued realization that life is perfect in its totally imperfect form.  Tomorrow is full of many things good and bad.  Sure each day will have traffic, children that don't want to listen, coffee spills, unexpected expenses and other crappie stuff.  However, it also holds some amazing gifts; a sunrise, beautiful sunsets, time together with the ones we love, memories, hugs/kisses and life changing miracles. I want to focus on the promises, love and beauty each day holds.  To awake to another day is an amazing gift.  

We will all allow those unimportant things that just seem huge to control us, but don't let them stay too long.  If you give them space within your being, they will take it all and more.  Before you know it you will be lost.  Everything in life has brought us to this point, good and bad, and I, for one, would take all the bad over again to be given all the amazing beauty and joy this life has provided.  

May you embrace life and live it as fully as you possibly can.  

This Me...

I got to thinking today about the person I have become over the last few years of my life and how different she is from the girl I used to be.  Sure there are some core things that have always been inside me, but  sometimes I have a hard time remembering the old me.

The me of a few years ago lacked self confidence and had almost never seen a workout.  This new person thrives on exercise.  I have not only fallen totally in love with this amazing thing, but I have even become a little obsessed.  There are so many amazing benefits I receive from my six day a week ritual.  I am happier, more energetic, have more self confidence and lowered stress level.

Additionally, I have started to care less about what other people think.  I am this person, you can take me or leave me.  I like to sing and dance in the car, especially when it embarasses my oldest.  Poor kids are in for a life of embarassing moments with me. I like public displays of affection.  I like to tell people I love them whenever the feeling hits.  In essence, I try to seize every moment I can in life.  Sure, I am guilty about having bad moments where I feel overwhelmed, stressed or angry over stupid things, but the key is to try hard to let the little things remain just that.

One of the most important things that has occurred in my transformation is falling more in love with myself.  Yeah that might sound conceded, but it is true.  Life isn't perfect, I am certainly not perfect and I know there will be challenges ahead.  However, I feel the person I have become is much better equipped to handle what life throws at me.

There is definitely a lot more that I want to accomplish, but I have come a long way.  Sometimes I have to remember to stop and take a look back.  It is good to push forward, challenge yourself to become more, but don't forget to give yourself credit for where you have come from.  It is just as important.

The Old Me!

Today's Me!!!

Saying Goodbye

Often times I find myself a little sad when a new purchase means saying goodbye to something I have used a lot.  I know this seems so silly to have any emotion for an inanimate object, but I find that things hold memories for me.  It can be an old sweatshirt, overused running shoes or an old book.  Sometimes the objects in our lives hold so much more than what is visible on their surface.

Tonight I was excited to see a package awaiting my arrival home.  I tore into it similar to a child on Christmas morning, and gazed at the beautiful newness of the contents.  You are probably thinking it was some exciting new toy, gadget or electronic device.  I am sure not many people would share the excitement I feel for my brand new heart rate monitor.  Yes, I am thrilled to report that I have replaced my worn out workout companion.

Now you might be asking why in the world this transition to a new one might bring sadness.... after all it is just a heart rate monitor.  However, it represents a lot more for me.  It is a piece of this journey.  When I began to use it my workouts became more intense, I pushed myself to work harder, and I fell in love with seeing visual feedback of my hard work. Almost every workout for over 4 years has started with putting on this heart rate monitor.  

As I began to pack it up I took a look at all the data stored in it.  Although it does not have it all because of a malfunction 18 months ago, the information it holds is a huge reminder of the lifestyle change I made all those years ago.  As I glanced over the numbers I was pretty amazed.  The numbers don't lie....

357 workout sessions wearing my this monitor in the last 18 months!!

525 hours spent working out!!!!

AND.... A total of 123,969 calories burned!!!

I have worn this monitor in two half marathons and countless other tests of my physical limits.  I am excited to have a more accurate monitor without all the issues this one has been having, however, it will hold a special place, as one of the many other symbols, along this road I continue to travel.